God's economy, goats and lye

2012 Arwen & Ashley

Through the years,  I believe we've been more of a ministry than a homestead farm.  We've given tours, hosted on farm culinary education, and homestead mentoring.  As long as I enjoy it, I'm glad to share my time, knowledge, experience, equipment, raw materials and recipes.

There were some "learn the hard way" times that dimmed my enthusiasm.  But I try to keep in mind that my life is bought with a price, and when I am DOING, if I'm doing as unto the LORD, it's all good.

God's economy is a beautiful aspect of His kingdom.  It is amazing to hear the stories of God working in other believers' lives.  And, praise the Lord, I am thankful to see God working in my life.  Up close and personal.

We sell extra goats throughout the year.  The goats have the whole reproducing after their own kind thing down pat.  Each freshening, we keep one or two and sell the rest.  We HAVE eaten goat, but it's been a few years.  I think the last goat processing appointment I had scheduled at Fort Valley State University (Small Ruminant Center) was when Hurricane Irma came through.  We cancelled that appointment due to the weather, and ended up selling those goats here instead.

In 2018, we lost a bit of money on one goat sale.  My fault - nobody's fault but mine.  I somewhat knew this local livestock person, having met years previously through an up-the-road-neighbor-friend.  I sold this person a goat kid on a payment plan.  After they finished making their payments, they picked up their goat kid.  No problem.  They expressed interest in one of our mama goats.  After we came to agreement on price, the person loaded up the mama goat with agreement to pay "next month."  I said since they were faithful to pay, and known for a number of years, I would trust them and their word.  They came back a month later not to pay but to ask for another goat.  I reminded them of their balance due, and said I would not do further business until that was paid.  Have not heard back since, so I let it go and figured it was a valuable learning experience.

At year end, I was discussing this situation with my husband, and asked what should we do about the mama goat balance still due on our square store.  We agreed we'd  just zero it out.

A short while later, I got a call from a very sweet sister in Jesus, who I had taught how to make soap a few years prior.  She was cleaning out her craft stuff, and came across a bunch of lye leftover from her soapmaking.  She asked if we could use it.  I seldom make soap, but Grace makes big batches of vegan-friendly soap a few times a year for soap customers.  So I said, yes, we sure can, and just let me know how much I can pay her.  She laughed and said this is a blessing from the Lord.

The dollar value of the lye and the dollar value of the mama goat are the same.  Praise God.  Thank you Jesus!    Dear Lord, please bless this dear sister in Jesus!  And dear Lord, please bless the mama goat person too.  Thank you Lord for provision, for family & friends, for health and strength and daily bread.  Thank you Lord for salvation by/of/through/Jesus and His precious blood.

a nugget (or pellet?) I picked up on my journey to the Four Lands...

The last few years have been a struggle for me in a lot of ways.  But I'm pretty sure I'm on the mend.  Very grateful for that.  I've "come up for air" and am rediscovering some joys I've misplaced along my way.  One of those joys is reading.  Not the kind that you feel like you HAVE TO read as an ASSIGNMENT.  But the kind you choose to because it takes you beyond where you are or where you've been in a way that makes you better for the journey.  I've dusted off my library card, and one of my daughters has kindly trained me how to look things up on the library site, request books, renew books, etc. 

So, let me introduce you to a series (don't you love series?  because when the book is finished you don't have to mourn forever, because there's another book to dive back into...? just don't think too much about the eventual end of the series...) that I can recommend with enthusiasm:  The Shannara Chronicles by Terry Brooks.  I happened into this kind of backwards.  Grace & Katie & I watched the televised show The Shannnara Chronicles, and for the most part enjoyed it.  As a mom watching with my daughters, I didn't so much appreciate the hot and heavy passion parts (less is more, folks. please leave most of that to the imagination - won't hurt the story line!  I mean, that's not in the books...).  But the underlying story sucked me in.  And when the season was finished I was curious about the books.  Since I'd already been introduced to the televised characters, the actors' faces remained cast in my mind, with Manu Bennett as Allanon remaining throughout.

Each book of the series has a good balance of action, drama and underlying good vs. evil.  There's plenty of suspense.  A good amount of heart ache and a lot of wisdom throughout.  It occurred to me in hindsight that I should have been keeping track of some of those wisdom nuggets.  Written them down for future reference/inspiration.  Yes, I know, that's why you BUY the book... but at this point in my life buying the books is not an option.  Thank the Lord for the library!  So, before I took the Elf Queen of Shannara back, I copied out one of my favorite little bits of wisdom I'm going to share with you here.  I hope that's okay with Terry Brooks?

Pages 164 & 165

The Elf Queen of Shannara

By Terry Brooks

Aurin Striate aka The Owl speaking to Wren:

                “Wren.”  She turned when he spoke her name and faced him.   “Let me tell you something you haven’t learned yet, something you learn only by living awhile.  As you get older, you find that life begins to wear you down.  Doesn’t matter who you are or what you do, it happens.  Experience, time, events – they all conspire against you to steal away your energy, to erode your confidence, to make you question things you wouldn’t have given a second thought to when you were young.  It happens gradually, a chipping away that you don’t even notice at first, and then one day it’s there.  You wake up and you just don’t have the fire anymore.”

                He smiled faintly.  “Then you have a choice.  You can either give in to what you’re feeling, just say ‘okay, enough is enough’ and be done with it, or you can fight it.  You can accept that every day you’re alive you’re going to have to face it down, that you’re going to have to say to yourself that you don’t care what you feel, that it doesn’t matter what happens to you because sooner or later it is going to happen anyway, that you’re going to do what you have to because otherwise you’re defeated and life doesn’t have any real purpose left.  When you can do that, little Wren, when you can accept the wearing down and the eroding, then you can do anything.  How did I manage to keep going out nights?  I just told myself I didn’t matter all that much – that those in here mattered more.  You know something?  It’s not so hard really.  You just have to get past the fear.”

 I'm currently reading The Talismans of Shannara by Terry Brooks.  As wisdom nuggets come along, I'm going to write them down (fully cited with page number, author, title, etc.).  Then when I'm done with the series, I'll go back and reread (Lord willing) - remembering this time to record the nuggets.  Terry Brooks has a cool website with all the books listed http://terrybrooks.net/books/ ; there's a new reader list and then another list in chronological order.  When I'm done with that, wouldn't it be great if I could start buying the books?  I do realize that's what normal people do...  :) 

2012 Photo Highlights for Katie

Year Of Happy New Year's Card

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I Choose Joy and Contentment

Deuteronomy 30:19  I call heaven and earth to record this day against you, that I have set before you life and death, blessing and cursing: therefore choose life, that both thou and thy seed may live:

As is often the case when someone I know dies, I have been thinking more than usual about my life, my choices, my time, where I’ve been, where I am, where I’m going and what matters to me most.

Back in the early 1990’s, my family consisted of my husband, our oldest daughter and me.  We had some folks visiting that told me (when my husband & daughter were not present) I was wasting my life and my talents, and how disappointed they were.  I was stunned by our visitors' opinion (and that’s what it was – an opinion), but managed to sputter out that I thought my husband and our daughter and our home were the most important parts of my life and I thought putting all my best energy & efforts towards them was not a waste of time.  I don’t know if they heard me; they kept tsk-tsking and shaking their heads.

This was one of those milestone events that pushed me into taking a very hard look at myself & my life.  Did I mean what I said?  Did I really believe that being a wife, a mom, a neighbor, a friend was what I wanted to spend my life on?  I concluded that yes, I meant what I said.

I still believe this to be the case – many years & two more daughters later.

At this point in my life I am less bothered by the opinions of the nay-sayers in my life.  These nay-sayers are always going to be one of the less pleasant aspects of relationships.  But they are certainly entitled to their opinion; and frankly, I’m thankful they feel comfortable being honest with me about their thoughts.  I am also thankful the Lord has been gracious to gift me with the blessing of rest and sleep, most of time.  I don’t lose sleep worrying over not living up to others’ expectations.  However if I felt I was disappointing the Lord Jesus, I would indeed be too troubled for rest or sleep, as has been the case off & on over the years.  I hope & pray the Lord continues to prompt, prick or poke my conscience when I am in need of correction!!

Life is short.  I don’t want to waste whatever time I have (be it four score more, or just another day) in bitterness over lost opportunities, in sorrow over hurt feelings or a broken heart, in longing over unfulfilled relationship(s), or in a mean-spirited state of unforgiveness.  It is my hope & prayer that God will continue to be gracious towards me, and continue to show me where He would have me to focus my time, to continue to correct me when I go astray (inside & out), and to keep me from wagging my finger or my attitude at others’ faults – and remind me that’s between them & the Lord.

And I pray the Lord grants me His grace and His love, and helps me to pray as I ought to pray for these folks; I ask the Lord to help me to point them to Him, and not be a stumblingblock in their walk. 

Deuteronomy 30:19  I call heaven and earth to record this day against you, that I have set before you life and death, blessing and cursing: therefore choose life, that both thou and thy seed may live:

Joshua 24:15  And if it seem evil unto you to serve the LORD, choose you this day whom ye will serve; whether the gods which your fathers served that were on the other side of the flood, or the gods of the Amorites, in whose land ye dwell: but as for me and my house, we will serve the LORD.

Job 9:14  How much less shall I answer him, and choose out my words to reason with him?

Job 34:4  Let us choose to us judgment: let us know among ourselves what is good.

Job 34:33  Should it be according to thy mind? he will recompense it, whether thou refuse, or whether thou choose; and not I: therefore speak what thou knowest.

Proverbs 1:29  For that they hated knowledge, and did not choose the fear of the LORD:

Proverbs 3:31  Envy thou not the oppressor, and choose none of his ways.

Isaiah 7:15  Butter and honey shall he eat, that he may know to refuse the evil, and choose the good.

Isaiah 7:16  For before the child shall know to refuse the evil, and choose the good, the land that thou abhorrest shall be forsaken of both her kings.

Philippians 1:22  But if I live in the flesh, this is the fruit of my labour: yet what I shall choose I wot not.

Nahum 1:7  The LORD is good, a strong hold in the day of trouble; and he knoweth them that trust in him.

Isaiah 58:11  And the LORD shall guide thee continually, and satisfy thy soul in drought, and make fat thy bones: and thou shalt be like a watered garden, and like a spring of water, whose waters fail not.

Titus 2:14  Who gave himself for us, that he might redeem us from all iniquity, and purify unto himself a peculiar people, zealous of good works.

James 4:8  Draw nigh to God, and he will draw nigh to you. Cleanse your hands, ye sinners; and purify your hearts, ye double minded.

Psalms 51:10  Create in me a clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit within me.

Psalms 73:1  « A Psalm of Asaph. » Truly God is good to Israel, even to such as are of a clean heart.

Proverbs 27:7  The full soul loatheth an honeycomb; but to the hungry soul every bitter thing is sweet.

Jeremiah 2:19  Thine own wickedness shall correct thee, and thy backslidings shall reprove thee: know therefore and see that it is an evil thing and bitter, that thou hast forsaken the LORD thy God, and that my fear is not in thee, saith the Lord GOD of hosts.

Ephesians 4:31  Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice:

Hebrews 12:15  Looking diligently lest any man fail of the grace of God; lest any root of bitterness springing up trouble you, and thereby many be defiled;

James 3:11  Doth a fountain send forth at the same place sweet water and bitter?

James 3:14  But if ye have bitter envying and strife in your hearts, glory not, and lie not against the truth.

Galatians 5:22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith,

Galatians 5:23  Meekness, temperance: against such there is no law.

Galatians 5:24  And they that are Christ’s have crucified the flesh with the affections and lusts.

Galatians 5:25  If we live in the Spirit, let us also walk in the Spirit.

Ecclesiastes 5:12  The sleep of a labouring man is sweet, whether he eat little or much: but the abundance of the rich will not suffer him to sleep.

Psalms 90:12  So teach us to number our days, that we may apply our hearts unto wisdom.

Hebrews 4:12  For the word of God is quick, and powerful, and sharper than any twoedged sword, piercing even to the dividing asunder of soul and spirit, and of the joints and marrow, and is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart.

Ezekiel 18:30  Therefore I will judge you, O house of Israel, every one according to his ways, saith the Lord GOD. Repent, and turn yourselves from all your transgressions; so iniquity shall not be your ruin.

Matthew 3:2  And saying, Repent ye: for the kingdom of heaven is at hand.

Revelation 3:19  As many as I love, I rebuke and chasten: be zealous therefore, and repent.

Psalms 51:11  Cast me not away from thy presence; and take not thy holy spirit from me.

Isaiah 63:10  But they rebelled, and vexed his holy Spirit: therefore he was turned to be their enemy, and he fought against them.

Isaiah 63:11  Then he remembered the days of old, Moses, and his people, saying, Where is he that brought them up out of the sea with the shepherd of his flock? where is he that put his holy Spirit within him?

Luke 11:13  If ye then, being evil, know how to give good gifts unto your children: how much more shall your heavenly Father give the Holy Spirit to them that ask him?

Ephesians 1:13  In whom ye also trusted, after that ye heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation: in whom also after that ye believed, ye were sealed with that holy Spirit of promise,

Ephesians 4:30  And grieve not the holy Spirit of God, whereby ye are sealed unto the day of redemption.

1 Thessalonians 4:8  He therefore that despiseth, despiseth not man, but God, who hath also given unto us his holy Spirit.

Matthew 23:23  Woe unto you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! for ye pay tithe of mint and anise and cummin, and have omitted the weightier matters of the law, judgment, mercy, and faith: these ought ye to have done, and not to leave the other undone.

Luke 11:42  But woe unto you, Pharisees! for ye tithe mint and rue and all manner of herbs, and pass over judgment and the love of God: these ought ye to have done, and not to leave the other undone.

2 Corinthians 2:15  For we are unto God a sweet savour of Christ, in them that are saved, and in them that perish:

Moving vs. Staying Put

My Dad's birthday is at the end of January.  This year he'll be 86.  He used to say "Old is older than I am."  Now he's admitting that time has caught up with him.  Even though he admits to senior citizen status, Dad is in amazingly good shape.  His big focus right now is polishing up his memoirs – I hope & pray the Lord helps Dad to finish this project that means so much to him.  And I also hope & pray that my Dad trusts in Jesus for his eternity, but that’s another story.

On our recent visit to my Dad’s & stepmom’s, he asked me if I had enjoyed moving around so much as a kid.  I laughed.  I answered like this:

Well, Dad, how many times has Tian moved since he’s been on his own?  What about Lal, especially since he’s had young’uns? 

And let’s see, before Bryant & I had young’uns we moved every year or so.  After we had Teresa (our oldest) we stayed in Stuarts Draft, VA,  for thirteen years. 

We’ve been at our current Box Springs, GA, homeplace for ten years.

No, Dad, I don’t enjoy moving.  I usually get kind of ill just thinking about it.  I get attached to people & places.  I put down roots and don’t like relocating.

I didn’t like the public school experience of being the new kid.

I did tell my Dad that I knew I learned a lot of amazing things from all the moving when I was young.

I’ve told my Dad many times that I realize that if our lives had taken different directions then I probably would never have met my husband, or had our three wonderful girls.  They are the most important parts of my life, and I don’t regret being a wife or mom, most of the time ;)  So even though there have been some hard memories along the way, I’m thankful for how they’ve brought me to NOW.

After the doings of the land of Egypt, wherein ye dwelt, shall ye not do: and after the doings of the land of Canaan, whither I bring you, shall ye not do: neither shall ye walk in their ordinances. 
Leviticus 18:3